schematic for making friends with someone other than that fake rock (2023) is a physical computing work that triggers text to display on screens embedded on either side of a fake rock when two people approach the system and are within a certain distance of one another. The text appearing on the screen is randomized from a dataset of 1000 utterances of fewer than eight words, starting with "you" or "I" that have been mined from transcripts of all episodes of the television sitcom FRIENDS. Activation of the text display requires two people to come into close physical contact, but in doing so, also interrupts them – confronted by a mediating barrier (a rock and two screens) in the space between them. The system fosters a fleeting moment of social connection between two friends, colleagues, or strangers, its form ultimately calling attention to the divide between the varied physical and digital realities between which we oscillate. The project opens questions about the nature of scripted human-computer interaction, language processing, and the ongoing mediation of friendship.